Advice Columns

"My future sister-in-law wants me to delay my wedding until she gets breast implants. I talked to my finacee (her brother!) and he agrees! Or says we should pay for her implants so she can get them sooner!" (Fourth letter down)

All I can think is RUN. Run far and fast and run run run.

Wow, I would just about have a shitfit if someone came and made those demands and then my soon to be husband decided that he didn't want to call out his sister on her bull and suggested paying for her implants. I really hope the LW talks this through with him very thoroughly because if the sister feels she can make this demand about someone else's wedding day, then she's obviously been doing this kind of thing for years and they're all letting her away with it, which means she'll continue to do it and the LW will find herself being pressured into kowtowing to another adult who really should be told to cop on and go away until she can talk some sense.

I'm all for not wanting conflict but that's just stupid. He's choosing to let his sister away with her nonsense over sticking up for what he and his fiancee want. That's a huge red flag and probable deal breaker.

So this is what it's like to marry into an episode of COPS.

When my friend got engaged, her mother (who was quite heavy and always on a diet) said "But you can't get married yet! I'm still fat!" I don't think she really meant it, though.

The Wonkblog has decided to answer Dear Prudence letters but in a more wonky way. I think it's my new favorite thing.

Unlucky Bear wrote:So this is what it's like to marry into an episode of COPS.

LOHee!

Whaaaaat. Prudence got a letter from someone whose teen got pregnant at a party and the LW wants to sue the parents of the kid who had the party because it's their fault this happened because they weren't supervising closely enough. Wow.

VodouDoll wrote:Whaaaaat. Prudence got a letter from someone whose teen got pregnant at a party and the LW wants to sue the parents of the kid who had the party because it's their fault this happened because they weren't supervising closely enough. Wow.

I LOVED her answer to the dad when he wrote back in. "Have you ever heard of a car? They have backseats..."

VodouDoll wrote:Whaaaaat. Prudence got a letter from someone whose teen got pregnant at a party and the LW wants to sue the parents of the kid who had the party because it's their fault this happened because they weren't supervising closely enough. Wow.

Personal responsibility isn't just dead, it's a zombie. A zombie with a lawyer!

The Bad Advisor weighed in!

Prison boyfriends are TOTES THE BEST for not being all up in your face and stuff

I wonder if she meant she wants to marry someone who is in jail for life, which would be, uh, not that much better.

Bzuh? She also claims that she works full-time, goes to school full-time, and still has plenty of time for her daughter. Does she have a time-turner?

I think Carolyn Hax might have been trolled by a LW who's watched a lot of Big Bang Theory.

Ha, I was thinking THE SAME THING. I couldn't believe CH didn't ask her how it felt to be dating Sheldon Cooper. Also, ew. Dump that guy already.

Prudie seems to really dislike dogs. A guy writes in to say that he's astonished that his relatives insist on keeping a dog that his daughter is afraid of. How dare they obtain a dog without thinking of his child's needs?! News flash, dad: not everything is about you.

If that letter turned around and the dog owners wrote about how their little guardianette is terrified of coming over because they got a new dog, Prudie's advice would have been to suggest meeting them at a restaurant or somewhere other than their house. Plus if they would have written that the father told them they "put the dog over his daughter's needs" she would have said he had some gall and supported them fully.

And not all dogs have to be crated. Some do, some don't. Some like it, some don't, etc. Dogs have personalities too, ya know.

The letter doesn't even say the dog is poorly behaved, just that it will be large when fully grown and the girl is afraid of it. Prudie invents the idea that she's afraid of it because her mother is dead.

Based on that information, they really need to deal with the girl's phobia, not bitch a her relatives for getting a dog. What an bizarre complaint - maybe she learned to fear dogs from him.

My oldest niece is three, and she is terrified of big dogs. Her parents never give family members a hard time for daring to have dogs, though. This whole situation reminds me that some people think the world revolves around them and their children, and it makes me want to puke. I hate that attitude.

That's just so nuts. One of my brothers was chased and bitten by a dog when he was two or three, and was (justifiably IMO) afraid of dogs as a result. Did my parents demand that everyone in our lives not have a dog? No, they just said "Hey, [Brother] is afraid of dogs because he got bitten, how can we deal with that when we come over?" and also worked on his phobia until the point where he wasn't afraid anymore. Usually people were more than happy to find a solution that worked for everyone, maybe because my parents weren't being assholes about it.

I'm just surprised that apparently the only way to contain a puppy is a crate. Are doors that rare? Are baby gates only for human babies now?

This has to be a joke, right?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter-in-law uses her name when making hotel reservations for the entire family. Should not she have used her husband’s name? She also has her voice on the answering machine. Should not the husband be the one with a message on the answering machine?

I mean...it's 2013. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?!

Lily Rose wrote:This has to be a joke, right?

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter-in-law uses her name when making hotel reservations for the entire family. Should not she have used her husband’s name? She also has her voice on the answering machine. Should not the husband be the one with a message on the answering machine?

I mean...it's 2013. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?!

Miss Manners's response was perfect!

But while we're at it... Divorce fundraisers? Really?

Ask a Manager had a bananas question today. The LW went on dates with a guy and then his wife made him call and tell the LW he couldn't date her anymore because he's married but then the wife somehow wound up trying to convince the LW that she should date the husband again and the LW was like, no thanks, I'm not into married guys, and the wife was like, DON'T JUDGE ME and the LW is interviewing at the wife's company? And the wife is notoriously incompetent at her job? WTF?

What the hell. On the one hand, wow, that sucks, on the other, I'm pretty sure that letters like that are why advice columns exist.

Your new baby is all about meeeee

This sounds an alarming lot like my mother.  While I have a couple of friends who ended up being grateful for their (otherwise difficult) parents coming by in the early days and providing relief care, there is no way in hell anyone gets to be in the delivery room other than my husband and me.  How disappointing and cruel we are.