Worst Movie(s) Ever

Page 1 of 2 1, 2  Next

View previous topic View next topic Go down

Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  punzy on Thu Nov 10, 2011 11:44 am

Because Reign of Fire is unwatchable. Even with shirtless Christian Bale, which should NOT happen. John Carpenter's Vampires is also in the running, because it was only saved by being free and someone in the audience using an "I love you" laser pointer at appropriate times.

punzy

Posts : 966
Join date : 2011-10-21

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  jcpdiesel21 on Fri Nov 11, 2011 12:03 am

Reign of Fire is pretty terrible despite the presence of Christian Bale, Matthew McConaughey AND Gerard Butler. I watched it when it was streaming on Netflix because I thought it would at least be fun, but it was fairly disappointing.
avatar
jcpdiesel21

Posts : 377
Join date : 2011-10-23
Age : 38
Location : Springfield, MO

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  whatthedeuce on Fri Nov 11, 2011 2:38 am

Reign of Fire was so egregiously stupid and boring. I think I might have made it through 15 minutes before surrendering to the fact that not even Christian Bale could save that movie.

whatthedeuce

Posts : 2615
Join date : 2011-10-26
Age : 32

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  laddical on Fri Nov 11, 2011 2:51 am

What's worse: a movie you are compelled to turn off or a movie you can't stop watching because it's a train wreck? If there were some objective standard of quality, I'd have to say that a movie so bad you can't turn away is easily the greater of two evils. But subjectively, I have to think a movie that can't even engage you as a demonstration of What Not To Do is the greater waste of time and money.

Like, I never bothered to finish Ecks vs. Sever or Cutthroat Island, but from what little I remember of what I did watch, nothing about those movies offended me in quite the same way that The Last Airbender did, and I watched that whole movie. Still, at least I finished it - does that make it better, in some way, than the other two?
avatar
laddical

Posts : 1607
Join date : 2011-10-22

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  blixie on Fri Nov 11, 2011 3:08 am

I used to think Deal of the Century was the worst movie ever made, and it is still truly awful both in the this is so painful it hurts to watch way, and YET I must keep going to see how bad it is way. BUT on my recent cruise in Greece they state room tv only had two English channels BBC news and The Worst Movie Channel On Earth. It was one bad movie after another. Terminator 4, Hannibal Rising with Gong Li and Rhys Ifans doing his version of Peter Stormare, a romantic comedy about two terminally ill cancer patients falling in love.

And then one night The Hollow Man came on, after 11 years I had successfully managed to remove that movies existence from my mind. Let's watch an arrogant bastard try to rape multiple women for two hours, let's try to convince people Elisabeth Shue is a brilliant scientist again after it didn't work in The Saint. Let's watch Kevin Bacon take his role so to heart that you want to kill his ass face five seconds into the movie. Christ that is so much worse than DotC.

blixie
Mod Squad

Posts : 1840
Join date : 2011-10-21

http://thesnarkening.forumotion.com

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  whatthedeuce on Fri Nov 11, 2011 3:51 am

laddical wrote:What's worse: a movie you are compelled to turn off or a movie you can't stop watching because it's a train wreck? If there were some objective standard of quality, I'd have to say that a movie so bad you can't turn away is easily the greater of two evils. But subjectively, I have to think a movie that can't even engage you as a demonstration of What Not To Do is the greater waste of time and money.

I think you might be right that a "trainwreck you must see all the way through" is worse because it compels you to waste more braincells and minutes of your life.

whatthedeuce

Posts : 2615
Join date : 2011-10-26
Age : 32

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  Crowbridge on Thu Nov 17, 2011 8:15 pm

I think the movie you can't get through is always worse. At least a trainwreck entertains you on some level; a 'can't watch' movie never does that.

Crowbridge

Posts : 705
Join date : 2011-11-16
Location : California

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  QueenSix on Thu Nov 17, 2011 8:44 pm

Um, yeah, I own Reign of Fire on DVD and quite like it. Not in a "OMG Christian Bale should have been Oscar nominated!" way, but it entertains me. Though I am always amused that a group of children raised in Northumberland in England all have Irish accents. It was filmed in Ireland all right so clearly the casting director wasn't looking for much for those parts other than "Is a child and can wear a blue smock type article of clothing regardless of gender".

But Matthew McConaughey and his chewing the scenery is a bit much.

QueenSix

Posts : 1314
Join date : 2011-10-22
Location : City of the Tribes, West of Ireland

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  oxymoron on Thu Nov 17, 2011 11:47 pm

Alexander
All the Greeks have Irish accents. God only knows what Angelina Jolie's accent was. Rosario Dawson comes from that part of Asia Minor that was colonized by Spain.

The acting is awful, the pacing is worse...

However, the line "You birthed me in a sack of hate!" is a delight.

oxymoron

Posts : 288
Join date : 2011-10-21

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  whatthedeuce on Thu Nov 17, 2011 11:48 pm

OMG! Alexander is absolutely horrific. I just can't understand why there were 500 different accents in that movie. I did love that Young!Alexander tried to sound Irish to match Colin's brogue though. I thought that was adorable.

whatthedeuce

Posts : 2615
Join date : 2011-10-26
Age : 32

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  The Glen on Fri Nov 18, 2011 11:08 am

I think the Macedonians were supposed to have Irish accents to differentiate them from the Greeks, who would have seen them as uncouth. Or some such. Oliver Stone came on Irish television and explained that it was because the Macedonians were supposed to be barbarians. Hopefully he didn't mean it in the insulting way it came out.

It's a terrible, terrible film, but it's great to mock. I'd almost put it in the Bad Movies You Love category, but it's far too long to enjoy.

The Glen
Mod Squad

Posts : 725
Join date : 2011-10-21
Location : Unemployed in Greenland

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  blixie on Fri Nov 18, 2011 11:47 am

It's a terrible, terrible film, but it's great to mock. I'd almost put it in the Bad Movies You Love category, but it's far too long to enjoy.

Ha, yes for me it's definitely a bad movie I can't make it through, but I enjoy it for the 20 minutes of hilarity it provides until I find something else to watch. If it had a stronger editor it would totally be Bad Movie you Love, cause dude, it has an ancient times intersex hooker! And I've always described it as an off screen orgy where a movie set broke out.

blixie
Mod Squad

Posts : 1840
Join date : 2011-10-21

http://thesnarkening.forumotion.com

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  TiffanyNichelle on Fri Nov 18, 2011 1:39 pm

I feel asleep in the theater watching that movie and I only woke up because some guy needed to get out of the row. I love Angelina and Colin but damn that movie was awful.
avatar
TiffanyNichelle

Posts : 606
Join date : 2011-10-21

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  dionneshea on Mon Nov 21, 2011 1:51 pm

For movies I actually wasted some hard earned cash on, nothing beats the Ralph Fiennes/Uma Thurman catastrophe, The Avengers. I was so bitter when I left the theatre after that train wreck. It was the first time I ever uttered, "I want my money and my two hours back!" Terrible.

What may almost be worse, though, because it was free on cable, was me trying to sit through Twilight. I made it I'm thinking about 20 minutes in. I'm not sure what happened next, but I sort of came to out of a fugue state to find myself cleaning my room. And I couldn't remember what I had been doing, so I continued cleaning my room. It was several hours later that I realised I had been watching Twilight and must have jumped ship early on. So, yes, apparently cleaning my room was more appealing to me than sitting through Twilight.
avatar
dionneshea

Posts : 501
Join date : 2011-10-21

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  The Dude on Thu Dec 08, 2011 1:00 pm

At Video Station I asked the clerk if it was fair to charge a late fee on Atlas Shrugged Part I if the movie has a running time longer than the rental period. He responded no one watches all the way through before turning off in boredom.

Supposedly part II is still on the way.
avatar
The Dude

Posts : 1141
Join date : 2011-10-25
Age : 43
Location : Peoples Republic of Boulder, South Rectangle

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  Tabby on Thu Dec 08, 2011 2:41 pm

Supposedly part II is still on the way.
Really? I thought Part I was only seen in the theaters by something like 172 people and lost buckets of money.
avatar
Tabby

Posts : 730
Join date : 2011-10-25
Age : 57
Location : Minneapolis, Minnesota

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  tothemax on Thu Dec 08, 2011 3:04 pm

The one thing I will always remember about Atlas Shrugged is that the DVD had to be recalled because of this misprint:
On the back of the film's retail DVD and Blu-ray however, the movie's synopsis contradictorily states "AYN RAND's timeless novel of courage and self-sacrifice comes to life..."

tothemax

Posts : 276
Join date : 2011-10-21

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  The Dude on Thu Dec 08, 2011 3:31 pm

Tabby wrote:
Supposedly part II is still on the way.
Really? I thought Part I was only seen in the theaters by something like 172 people and lost buckets of money.
Yep and the producer is still talking about having it out for the election and 30-40 minutes longer. Might be before denial has given way to reality though. Makes me wistful for other 2/3rds of Courtney Solomons' Dungeons & Dragons trilogy or the rest of Battlefield Earth.
avatar
The Dude

Posts : 1141
Join date : 2011-10-25
Age : 43
Location : Peoples Republic of Boulder, South Rectangle

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  The Dude on Tue Feb 14, 2012 2:57 pm

Best Worst Movie is on netflix. It's a documentary on Troll 2 made by the boy in the movie focusing mainly on the George Hardy the guy who played the father. It starts off well, Hardy has a pretty rich life as a dentist. It was nice to see someone with this kind of notoriety who isn't a bitter never-was or is more or less a professional circus freak like Tommy Wiseau. After a while he gets a little too into the notoriety and you roll your eyes about the 800th time he quotes "you can't piss on hospitality!". Towards the end he establishes some balance going back to his dental practice and still being just a bit of a ham (he was a male cheerleader).

The villain of the piece is Troll 2 director Claudio Fragasso who just doesn't get it, taking everything deadly serious and having no ability to laugh at himself. It gets embarrassing as he yells at the actors during some of the Q&As, he calls them "dogs" at one point. He should take some satisfaction that he directed 25 movies and is still going while other guys on the W.M.E. like Hal Warren had only one or two kicks at the can.
avatar
The Dude

Posts : 1141
Join date : 2011-10-25
Age : 43
Location : Peoples Republic of Boulder, South Rectangle

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  blixie on Mon Jul 23, 2012 1:23 am

Good God, I just subjected myself to Something Borrowed there was not one authentically real moment in that entire movie, every single choice the characters made seemed to designed for maximum idiocy and obnoxiousness. John Krasinski was the best part, but his character is still a total asshole, you pretty much only like him because he hates Kate Hudson and because he looks like John Krasinski. AND who looks at a John Krasinski and decides NO I think I'll take that guy who got fired from the Melrose Place reboot? The one that got CANCELLED? Yeah him, the guy who played Erica Kane's abortion? They guy Tom Cruise plans to Body Snatch with engrams? Now I know why Ginnifer Goodwin never smiles, if starred in this movie I'd never smile again either.


blixie
Mod Squad

Posts : 1840
Join date : 2011-10-21

http://thesnarkening.forumotion.com

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  Raksha on Mon Jul 23, 2012 5:15 am

Apparently Manos: The Hands of Fate is so bad, just one riffing wasn't enough. If anyone needs to get in touch with me that week, I'll be camped out in front of the theater.
avatar
Raksha

Posts : 963
Join date : 2011-10-22
Age : 36
Location : 137

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  Raksha on Sat Oct 20, 2012 3:54 am

As if the originals weren't dreadful enough, now Nicolas Cage is in talks to star in the reboot of the Left Behind movies. These books/movies just won't fucking die!
avatar
Raksha

Posts : 963
Join date : 2011-10-22
Age : 36
Location : 137

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  Unlucky Bear on Sat Oct 20, 2012 1:07 pm

I hope this is just some epic trolling on Cage's part, because judging from what I read on the Slacktivist's blog, those books are completely vile.
avatar
Unlucky Bear
Official Succubus

Posts : 1036
Join date : 2011-10-21
Age : 33
Location : Suburban Chicago

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  QueenSix on Sat Oct 20, 2012 1:31 pm

I read some of those books about ten years ago. I hadn't realised that they were written by religious guys until about the third book. I just thought it was a story about people coping with an apocalypse, and that they'd taken bits from the bible and gone with them. Hah! No wonder the guy in that bookshop around Fanueil Hall looked at me oddly in 2001 when I bought the second one. Can't say I ever thought they were particularly well written though, especially the dialogue. Once I realised they were RELIGIOUS BOOKS that were TRYING TO SAVE MY SOUL, I got a bit bored and sent them to the charity shop.

You would think that Nicolas Cage would have learnt his lesson from the dire Knowing and would stay clear of any film that had to do with the end of the world from now on.

QueenSix

Posts : 1314
Join date : 2011-10-22
Location : City of the Tribes, West of Ireland

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  laddical on Sat Oct 20, 2012 3:15 pm

Once I realised they were RELIGIOUS BOOKS that were TRYING TO SAVE MY SOUL, I got a bit bored and sent them to the charity shop.

Yeah, they're not trying to save anyone's soul. As Slacktivist points out, the books exist as a sort of "Nyah, nyah, nyah YOU GUYS ARE SCREWED" bit of back-pattery for pre-millenialist evangelicals.
avatar
laddical

Posts : 1607
Join date : 2011-10-22

Back to top Go down

Re: Worst Movie(s) Ever

Post  Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

Page 1 of 2 1, 2  Next

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum