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Fifty Shades of Grey

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Fifty Shades of Grey Empty Fifty Shades of Grey

Post  particle_person Fri Apr 27, 2012 1:43 am

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Post  MtOlivePickles Fri Apr 27, 2012 2:18 am

We had a brief discussion about this book (and Twilight) in my YA lit class a few weeks ago.

It was very surreal.

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Post  Menshevixen Fri Apr 27, 2012 9:18 am

"Fair point well made, Miss Steele."

I think 50 Shades of Suck is right; that is not even a sentence, let alone one that should be repeated 80 times.

I'm betting this book will come up at my FYA book club meeting this weekend. And it will be hilarious.
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Post  big chicken Fri Apr 27, 2012 10:50 am

From over at the Current Reads thread,
Spoiler:

To which I can only reply, "WHAT? HOW?" Is it like that dude who tried to eat Scully's tumor on the X-Files?

Oh, jeeze.

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Post  Never Enough Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:11 am

The book was mentioned on "Chelsea Lately" this week. No mention about it originally being fanfic, but man they were trashing it! Most of the people on the panel had read it, or at least tried before giving up. One person said it was like porn written at a 3rd grade level!

The best part was when the guy who had read it explained the tampon scene to Chelsea and everyone got really horrified and grossed out. HA!

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Post  Rhilin Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:32 am

*googles the tampon scene*

Huh. I half expected her to rip off the scene from Anatomy of Hell. I'm not sure if that lowered or raised my expectations though. Neither of those words seem accurate.

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Post  Putli Bai Fri Apr 27, 2012 6:00 pm

It's as if this book was written to take the pressure off Stephanie Meyer. "You think Twilight sucked? Take a look at THIS!"

I'm feeling compelled to accept the challenge and write a 50 Shades fanfic, then do a find/replace with the names and be a best-selling author too.

I've got it - "Sadomasochistic sparkle-wizards compete in a battle to the death for the amusement of others!"

No one steal this. I'm gonna be a bazillionaire!
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Post  Crowbridge Fri Apr 27, 2012 9:20 pm

Putli Bai wrote:I'm feeling compelled to accept the challenge and write a 50 Shades fanfic, then do a find/replace with the names and be a best-selling author too.
I'd call mine '50 Shades of Brown.' Because it's SHIT.

I'm so clever. ;)

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Post  Luthien Fri Apr 27, 2012 9:22 pm

Someone asked Chris Pine if he'd be interested in playing Christian Grey. His answer: “It’d be a hell of a choice for me, I think,” he smiled. “It sounds like an interesting film.”

Which I think (and fervently hope) is polite-speak for "not in a million years, I'm freaking Captain Kirk."

I have not and do not intend to read these books; reading the excerpts is painful enough. I don't read many romance novels, and haven't read any erotica, but do most authors in this genre have their heroines say "holy cow", "holy crap", etc? Somehow I think not. Way to instantly kill the mood, James. It's godawful painful just to read the extracted sentences. All that stuff about the "inner goddess" is among the stupidest junk I've ever had the misfortune to read, and I read all four Twilights, and the Da Vinci Code!

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Post  punzy Fri Apr 27, 2012 9:42 pm

I have read many many romance novels and the answer is no, no one talks like that. Or thinks like that.

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Post  Cynara Sat Apr 28, 2012 1:01 am

Guys, that Tumblr is a thing of beauty. I am CACKLING here.

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Post  Crowbridge Sat Apr 28, 2012 2:16 pm

It's obvious James is writing about a type of sex she has never engaged in herself. I don't think she did any research into BDSM, either. Just a shitty, shitty writer all around. And people are buying this book like there is no tomorrow.

There isn't enough *headdesk* in the WORLD.

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Post  MLIS Sat Apr 28, 2012 7:00 pm

My husband's younger (she's 25, but a very, very young 25) cousin just posted as her Facebook status "Why can't men like Christian Grey exist in real life? Sigh."

I weep.

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Post  Jude Sat Apr 28, 2012 8:24 pm

Humorless? Check.

Controlling asshole? Check.

Gets off on causing me pain? Check, check, and CHECK!

Yeah, that's my dream man, for sure.

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Post  Crowbridge Sat Apr 28, 2012 9:00 pm

MLIS wrote:My husband's younger (she's 25, but a very, very young 25) cousin just posted as her Facebook status "Why can't men like Christian Grey exist in real life? Sigh."

I weep.

Um, 25 year old? Guys like Christian Grey do exist in real life. Walk down the block, and I guarantee you'll find a controlling, humorless asshole. They're EVERYWHERE.

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Post  bbridges Sat Apr 28, 2012 9:31 pm

They are not generally billionaires, though.
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Post  big chicken Sat Apr 28, 2012 10:30 pm

Ellen DeGeneres take on 50 Shades.

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Post  truecrystal Sat Apr 28, 2012 10:56 pm

I've had 3 conversations in the past week with 30+ year-old, intelligent, professional women who've asked me about this. Two out of the three couldn't figure out the big deal, and the third thought it was "sooo much better than Twilight". I don't know what that means since I never read any of the Twilight books. It made me sad that they'd bought in to the hype and read it at all.

I've read excerpts--mostly the sex--and as a self-proclaimed connoisseur of erotica (heh) it's just...bad. The BDSM reads like something off of Red Shoe Diaries. And saying "fuck" alot? Doesn't make the sex sexier. Neither does constantly describing your vagina as a deep, dark place. It kills me that the reaction to this is like teenagers' reaction to Forever back in the day.

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Post  big chicken Sun Apr 29, 2012 12:05 am

It's not just a deep, dark place. It's a liquidy deep, dark pace. James' descriptions of orgasms make me think of explosive diarrhea.

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Post  Crowbridge Sun Apr 29, 2012 12:46 am

My inner goddess did a double backflip as Christian's grey eyes narrowed at me. I could feel his stare burning through me, down to my deep, dark, liquidy womanhood, and I stirred in my seat. Holy shit. Why did he have this affect on me? Since I met him, I'd gone through sixteen pairs of brand new panties. My subconscious was telling me this wasn't a good idea, but I clenched my teeth and let him bend me over his knee.
"You're a naughty little girl, Anastasia Steele," he said dangerously. "Hold still while I fuck you now."


Anybody can write this goddamn book.

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Post  big chicken Sun Apr 29, 2012 1:42 am

What amazes me most about that paragraph is that she actually said "Holy shit".

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Post  Putli Bai Sun Apr 29, 2012 2:16 am

o_O

Those words...in that order....best seller?????

Not enough "head desk" in the world.
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Post  Menshevixen Sun Apr 29, 2012 9:36 am

A couple weeks ago one of my patrons requested this book. Yes, I work in a library...but it's a corporate library geared almost exclusively toward graphic design, art and art history, and writing. We don't have many novels at all. Since we had some money left in our book budget for the month, my boss ordered it and when it came in we all had a good giggle (one gay guy across the hall was baffled and somewhat horrified).

I guess, like Twilight and other not-so-awesome bestsellers, I'm glad that people want to read this book. I just hope that if they enjoy it they go on to find better erotica.


...what does "deep, dark, liquidy womanhood" even mean?
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Post  punzy Sun Apr 29, 2012 11:49 am

Probably that she needs to see a doctor ASAP.

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Post  Crowbridge Sun Apr 29, 2012 12:10 pm

Menshevixen wrote:...what does "deep, dark, liquidy womanhood" even mean?
Don't know. I made it up.

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